2 weeks in

I'm two weeks into my time in Uganda. It feels like it has been so much longer. There is some kind of weird time warp going on where the pace seems slower than I am used to, but at the same time so much is happening. I find myself talking slower and simpler so my words will be understood. I've been with CLD since Sunday and have been hanging with a bunch of CMC students from Steamboat. They are a blast and we have been working hard cleaning up the school classrooms and grounds to be ready for students returning Monday, doing some yard work and an after school program at 'thread of life', working on the farm and much more. We slept outside at the farm last night and I did not sleep well, partly because I was worried about the wild things and partly because I was uncomfortable on a thin foam pad on concrete and partly because I'm pretty sure there were fleas crawling all over me.

I find myself longing for my comfortable life in America. Life is hard here and chaos is everywhere. Just getting around is difficult. Getting in bed is difficult as tucking in the mosquito net all the way around is a step to not be neglected. The other day as I was taking a shower, there was a moment when the cold water took my breath away for a few seconds before I got used to it, and I thought 'this is horrible'. Then I remembered that I am one of the lucky ones because I have a shower. Most here shower with a bucket and a cloth and most are facing much tougher problems related to their poverty.

Ben, our Ugandan friend and the leader of CLD Uganda spoke the other day about helping and how handouts do more harm than good. When we who have so much come and see so many needs, our knee jerk reaction is to give and fix it with our money. But giving money to someone begging only reinforces that they are a begger and that is all they will ever be. It reinforces the cycle of poverty and dependence. He talked about the bigger problem and how everyone wants to look out the window and blame others but we need to look in the mirror. Real change involves relationship and investing ourselves, our time and our hearts into people to show them that they are valuable. Ben gave the analogy of giving a man a fish or teaching him to fish... Or giving someone a meal vs. giving them the recipe so that they can continue to make that meal and maybe even make it better. Education is key. In the end it's not our money that changes things, it is the investment of our time and our lives that does. It's cool to see this concept play out in the projects here.

I've heard a few peoples stories that would break anyone's heart and they put my light and momentary troubles into perspective. I realize that there are bigger problems here than I have the ability to fix. I also know that though I am uncomfortable I am right where I am supposed to be. I'm confident that God will use my sacrifice to bring some peace to the chaos. Still I'm counting the days till my family comes and till I'm in Steamboat again. 4 weeks for my family and 5 wks, 3 days till Steamboat... Taking one day at a time, it's not quite as overwhelming.